Teenspot Follow UP

As a follow up to last week’s blog, I hope you had some time to check out the web site Teen Spot and some of the posts that where on there, especially under the teen issues title. The thought that there are actually kids going here for advice is a little scary. Well, let’s face it …it’s real scary. I’m sure that there are a lot of other sites out there as well — some better, some worse. Either way these kids are dealing with a lot of complex issues in their lives and possibly have no one to turn to or nobody they feel comfortable enough with to talk about some of this stuff. By stuff, I mean sex. It’s a tough subject and can be real difficult to tackle. So first off, are we making ourselves approachable and/or accessible? If not, is the computer their only other option? Then the next question is, are we properly equipped to answer the questions they have and give the advice they need to hear without giving them another lecture?

Media Talk

www.CPYU.org, (The Center for Parent and Youth Understanding) posted an interesting link this week: 20 Stars 20 and Younger. I took a look through it, just to see how “in the know” I am these days. (I did pretty well.)

I spent some time reading teen comments and reactions to the chosen stars while I flipped through the photos. It got me thinking. Maybe our parents could take a look at the link and then chat about those celebs with their teens. Ask them what they think about the Jonas Brothers’, Miley Cyrus’s, or Annasophia Robb’s popularity. Ask them about the movies in which they act. Ask them what actors they appreciate or like.

 It might be a good way to get your teen talking about the media, and give you as a parent the opportunity to find out which media messages are getting through to your kids.

“Idol”izing Role Models

I’ll admit it: I’m an American Idol watcher. I love the show. My husband is extremely musical and desires to be in the industry, so we watch it together and critique the contestants as though we were the judges.

 I do not, however, love the commercialism of the show. The quantity of advertising annoys me (I doubt anyone likes it), as does the vague uneasiness that whoever becomes the #1 American Idol becomes a sellout. I doubt that David Cook is living the rocker life he imagined before being on Idol.

This season, one other thing that bothers me is the number of single moms that have run through the show. For a while there were three – now we’re down to two. And if I am doing my math correctly, they were all teen moms. Why does this bother me? I think it has to do with how American Idol is focused around “creating” a new pop star to become a package deal “role model” for the American public. The judges always talk about “likeability” – those higher on the scale make it further in the competition. And that means that the winning Idol is chosen because America loves him (or her) and wants that person in the spotlight as an example of success. What is America going to do with Alexis and Megan?

At W4YM, we spend a lot of time encouraging teens to believe that marriage is not only an excellent institution, but that it is necessary, and a very attainable goal for them. I have no doubt that these two single moms work hard and desire a great life for their children. Alexis actually said that she was pursuing this competition because she wanted the best life possible for her child. And I know plenty of great single moms – my own mom was on her own a while.

But I don’t want either one of these women to win. I wonder what kind of great life is in store for their kids if they fall victim to pop stardom. If one of them is chosen, what message does her example send to our teen girls in relation to teen pregnancy, motherhood, and success?

Identity With a Price Tag

This is an excerpt from an article I found on www.cpyu.org. I enjoyed it so much I’m posting it here for you to read. What do you think?

The over-riding narrative of consumerism is: “You are what you consume.” Identity is based on what a teen can purchase and put on display. The result is that adolescent identity tends to be formed externally rather than generated internally.One strategy marketers use is “identity branding.” This is an explicit effort to get teens to identify themselves with a particular product or corporate brand. The craze around Apple’s iPod is an example of this identity branding.  The iPod has changed the face of the music industry.  As a part of iPod’s early, and vastly successful ad campaign, the website’s homepage contained a neon-colored image screaming for your attention. The image was the now-familiar dark silhouette of a trendy young person passionately dancing to the music playing on the white iPod linked by earphones to his ear. The caption read, “Which iPod are you?” Notice the question wasn’t “Which iPod do you prefer?” or “Which iPod suits your lifestyle?” It was an overt attempt to blend product and identity in hopes that teens would fuse their own identity with their product. With millions of consumers gobbling up iPod and iTunes products every year, the strategy of mixing identity and brand must be working.But consumerism doesn’t stop there. It also engages in a marketing strategy we could call “caricaturing.” In an effort to sell their products more efficiently, corporate advertisers go so far as to design a form of adolescent identity for teens to readily adopt.Extensive research and vast of marketing dollars have generated teen-targeted, media-created caricatures. One example is the “Mook.” He is the crude, loud, obnoxious, in-your-face male: a teen frozen in permanent adolescence. Mooks can be found everywhere. They’re the daredevils on “Jackass.” They star in MTV’s Spring Break specials.  Mooks continue to be spun out as key characters in new television shows every season. You don’t have to look very hard.But there’s no real Mook. It’s a market creation designed to take advantage of the testosterone-driven craziness of male adolescence. Teenage males identify with it and “buy into” it. All that needs to be done is associate merchandise with the Mook caricature and you have Mooks gobbling up those products.Along with the Mook, the media machine has also produced a female caricature. The “Midriff”-no more true to life than the Mook-is the sexually empowered, prematurely adult female. The Mook doesn’t care what people think of him, but the Midriff is consumed by appearances. The Midriff is a repackaged collection of sexual clichés, but marketed as a form of empowerment. Your body is your best asset. Flaunt your sexuality even if you don’t understand it.2 Celebutantes Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and Britney Spears seem to embody the essence of the Midriff. The marketing strategy is similar to that of the Mook: project the caricature to teens and they will embrace and begin to personify them. All you need to do is infuse a brand or product into a pre-designed teen market.”

Approaching “Twighlight”

Parents,

As I was researching today, I came across a bunch of article and opinions about the new movie Twilight opening next week. Here are a few links for you to check out.*

1. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/twilight/ – gives a good overview of the plot, and includes many trailers, as well as posts from teenagers which reveal how their minds are perceiving the film.

2. http://www.parentpreviews.com/movie-reviews/twilight.shtml – A review of the movie which gives a general breakdown of what to expect from its PG-13 rating in regards to sensuality, explicit language, etc.

3. http://www.thesource4ym.com/youthculturewindow/article.asp?ID=56 – Another viewpoint to compare with the review above. This author is conservative, but very specific.

 Take a look parents, before you take your teens out to see the new flick. You may find these sites helpful!

*The opinions expressed on the websites above are for reference purposes only and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Wait For Your Mate.

Proof in the Programming

Scientists have finally found a concrete link between the sexual content in television, and teenage pregnancy. Check out the article here.

 And speaking of mass media, look at what scientists have discovered about video games.

From birth, our brains are programmed towards mimicry. It’s how we learn when we are very young, but it is something that continues even up into adulthood. There’s studies showing that violent and sexual images often get mixed up in the minds of youth. Parents, if you were doubtful before, be aware.

Lay down the law about what your kids can and can’t watch (or game). Spend time watching TV with them, and observing their video game habits. Discuss what you see. It will help your kid sort things out.

What Memories Are Made Of

A few days after reading & posting about The Primal Teen, I found this interesting article about the chemicals the brain uses to make memories. You can check out the full article here, but here’s a quote that sums up what researchers found:

“University of Virginia psychologists have moved the science of memory forward, reporting that stimulating the vagus nerve, which carries sensory messages to and from the brain, releases the nuerotransmitter norepinephrine in to the amygdala, strengthening memory storagein limbic regions of the brain that regulate arousal, memory, and feeling responses to emotionally laden stimuli (emphasis mine).”

Then today I stumbled upon an article in USA Today about children as young as ten watching R-rated movies (Bride of Chuckie and Blade topping the list), and another article about the Teen Choice Awards, (the super-sexy show Gossip Girl won big). I thought about what I had read about memory making, and I began to wonder.

Parents, do you remember what it felt like to be a kid watching a scary movie? Did your heart pound? Do you remember being allowed to watch a steamy scene on TV? Did your pulse race? It’s very likely that during that time, your adrenaline was pumping, and norepinephrine was being released into your brain. That’s why you remember it.

We all know that TV today is laden with sexual imagery and violence. But do we know how much? Are we really sure we know what our teens are watching? And have we considered the effect it may have on them long-term?

It’s something to think about.

Do you know where your children are?

The world wide web equals access to the world. It also means the world has access to you. And your kids. Yet children online can be sitting “safely” in your living room, so why worry about them? A new study conducted by Harris Interactive reveals that parents may be turning a blind eye to their children’s internet use. For instance, parents estimate that their children spend 2 hours a week on the internet, but children report spending 10 times that (20 hours).

Two helpful pointers for parents:

  • Move the computer into a part of the house that is easily monitored,
  • and ask your child to show you his or her favorite sites.

Being involved will equip you to step in as a parent should any unsafe situations arise.

Becoming a media-savvy parent

I found this helpful link in the newsletter of the Center for Parent and Youth Understanding.

The link will take you to six great tips for getting to know the media that your children are most likely already familiar with. Two things to keep in mind: today’s media can be dangerous or unhealthy when misunderstood or misused; a parent’s job is to do more than shelter a child from media. Parenting involves teaching children how to use media safely. As you learn to use different forms of media, you can guide your child to also use media wisely and safely.