Picking up where we left off a week ago. Here are some suggested “house rules” you may wan tot consider.
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Set an age for dating such as “No dating in the pre-teen and early teen years.” And ask your son or daughter what dating means to him or her. It can mean different things to different young people at different ages. Plus, it’s a good way to start a conversation.
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Discuss your concerns with them dating someone more than two years older or younger than he or she is.
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Research by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy shows that 13 percent of youth aged 14 and under in a same age relationship have had sexual intercourse. But when a pre-teen or teen of this age has a relationship with somebody who is 2 years older, 26 percent of the time it involves sexual intercourse. If the relationship is with somebody 3 years older, 33 percent of the time it involves sexual intercourse.
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Tell your teen that boyfriends or girlfriends are welcome in family living areas and can be entertained there. Discourage personal space entertainment. “First sex” often happens at home in an unsupervised area of the house.
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Set clear guidelines for your child when he or she goes out: Where will you be? What will you be doing? Who will you be with? When will you be home? How can I reach you?
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Don’t let your child spend lots of time doing things that are not supervised or monitored by adults. Encourage your child to take part in supervised group activities. After-school jobs, tutoring, volunteer activities, and sports help make sure your child is doing something safe and useful after school.
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Set rules about what your son or daughter can and cannot watch, listen to, or read; about what video games they can play; and where they can go on the Internet. Do not put a television or a computer in your child’s bedroom. These should be out in the open, like in the living room. That way you can know what your child is watching or doing on the Internet.
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Let your son or daughter know that you will come get them if they get into an uncomfortable or threatening situation.
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No alcohol. No drugs. No tobacco.
You may consider printing off your rules and posting them where everyone can see. This way there is no misunderstandings about what is acceptable behavior and what is disobedience.